Not fast enough. A floating time-capsule of the 1980's. The mere appearance, its graphics and the shape of the vessel made me nauseous and more curious as to how it remained in service. I already negated the idea of surviving a ferry-ride to Catalina aboard one of these shuttles... but here I was, my party's organizer heeded my dreams and there was no escape. Of course, we were on the less-impressive of the vessels pictured... An exercise practiced by tourism traps the world over. When boarding, my small carry-on backpack was annoyingly summoned to the floor with a large pile of disorganized luggage, which I ignored, and I made my way to the top deck with my party, as I preferred not to have my goods stolen before my "adventure" in Catalina began. The top-deck was an hour of "this sucks". You do not choose your neighbors; so be forewarned to bring headphones or something, you may end up listening to awful stories for an hour. The occasional humor, including the view of flying garments and those ill-fated tossing-up over the side. Certainly, be sure to bring a jacket, or a windbreaker, no matter how hot the weather forecast. Secure your hat and devices, you may just lose it. And no matter how many mai tai's you consume on Catalina Island, there is no escaping the return trip. The return trip was initially boarded by many of Catalina's famous bees. One landed and made its home for a short while under my bicep; which had my partner fleeing down the aisle for their life and passengers already scarred by their bee experiences on the island beginning to freak-out all around my seating position. The service receives points for cocktail service, which I should have enjoyed but otherwise, I remained mentally focused on zoning out for as long as possible to shorten the trip in my head. Catalina Express is a great way to harden your mental endurance and tolerance of uncomfortable but necessary activities in life. I would hope that Catalina Express brings out the next thirty years of hardware soon so we can see the future once again.